Glimpses: How Mental Health Has Touched Our Lives: Forgive Yourself

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Forgive Yourself

A glimpse into a life with suicidal ideation

I have struggled with suicidal ideation since I was 11 or 12 years old. With the help of a combination of resources and my growing relationship with God I am no longer dominated with these thoughts. I think my relationship with God has been crucial in helping me through. It has made me feel like I am not going through this alone; there is purpose and meaning through Him. John 16:33 "...Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows, but take heart, I have overcome the world." Relapse is part of the process/life; forgive yourself!

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TIPS

Create a network of support/care by implementing a combination of the below that will work for you...

Prayer: Thank God for positive things in your life but also be authentic about how you are feeling about the negative things; tell him what you need.

Self Talk: Pay attention to how you speak to yourself; would you like a friend to speak to you this way? As you become aware of negative thought patterns it may become easier to reflect on where the thoughts are coming from, redirect them, and replace them with encouraging words. Take time to commend yourself on something positive you did today (e.g. got out of bed, shower, made someone smile, got x done, etc.)

Forgive yourself: If you're feeling overwhelmed by guilt I have found it helpful to write the offences which are burdening me and subsequently burn them/rip them up/destroy them in some way to give a sense of finality to them.

Goals: Set realistic goals for yourself; if you have a to-do list maybe limit your list to 3-4 items per day instead of 7-8

Self-care: Take time out of every day to do something for you (e.g. special treat, massage, movie, reading a book, workout, journal, meditate, meet with friend etc.)

Get involved: Join a class, sports team, or volunteer. It may help you see life beyond yourself. It may sound strange, but focusing on how I can love God/others has deflected some of the pressure/temptation to focus on my own issues.

Ingest: Vitamin B, D, Omega 3s (e.g. salmon, walnuts, eggs); avoid high sugar foods (decreases energy)

Sleep: Get enough sleep to keep your immune system strong! (e.g. 8-9 hours)

Hydrate: Dehydration may lead to headaches and tiredness which may make you more vulnerable to stressors.

Exercise: It releases endorphins which are natural happy hormones! Do a short workout video on youtube, walk your dog, take a hike on a trail, walk/bike to work, 30 second plank. Sometimes people are more motivated when they have a buddy, so join a class or sports team.

Humour: Laughing also releases endorphins! Youtube some comedy.

Guided Meditation

Breathing Techniques (e.g. square breathing)

Visualize relaxing experience

Stretch

Gratitude journal: Make a list of things your grateful for. It’s helpful to refer to when everything feels like it's falling apart.

Dream: Make a list of dreams or aspirations (e.g. something you'd like to learn, what you want of your life)

Journal

Talk Therapy: Talk to a counsellor or someone you trust about how you are feeling. Talk to someone who will take away the shame. Support groups (e.g. Self Help Alliance- peer-based support).

Medication: Research indicates that medication combined with therapy has the best outcomes; many people rely on solely medication without making lifestyle/other changes. While the medication may resolve any chemical imbalances, additional supports may also be helpful

Identify triggers and safety plan around them.

Avoid relying on one person for support as this can be isolating when they are unavailable and may create an unhealthy dependency

BIBLICAL

There are so many gems in the Bible, comforting words which reveal God's loving nature.

Matt. 6:32-34; Luke 11:9-10; 1 Peter 5:6; Luke 18:7

"This High Priest [Christ] of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do [e.g. rejection] yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most." Heb. 4:15-16

Forgive yourself. Christ already forgave you e.g. 1 John 1:9.

Read through the Psalms They can be comforting They acknowledge how painful life can be e.g. 23, 25, 37, 143…

Ephesians 3:20 "Now all glory to God who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think." I believe God intercedes in people's lives, and sometimes this only becomes apparent in retrospect.

Change takes time so we can realize it's a gift from God, not something done out of our own strength (1 Peter 5:7; 5:10) "So do not worry or be anxious about tomorrow for tomorrow will have worries and anxieties of its own. Sufficient for each day is its own trouble."

"Feelings are good servants but horrible masters."

2 Corinthians 12:8-9 "Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, 'My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.' So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so the power of Christ can work through me..."

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Forgive Yourself

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